She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
