just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize