i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
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