standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
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