hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
