belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize
