I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Randomize
