I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Randomize
