if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
