why do cheetos always look like penises
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
