Sry I called you an 8
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
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