I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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