I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Randomize
