its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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