This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
