We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
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