Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
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