your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
