I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Randomize
