All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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