My brain says no but my pants say off.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
Randomize