i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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