I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
