there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
