You're completely useless in the revolution.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Randomize