i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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