Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Randomize
