Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
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