This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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