He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize
