we have officially lost it.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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