Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
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