that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Randomize
