Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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