So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
