At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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