they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
when i woke up i was missing $380 from my bank account
damn...impressive bar tab
no i guess i bought a gasoline powered blender off ebay, i need a breathalyzer for my computer
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Randomize
