and she was petting her beer can
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
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