Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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