dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
