My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Randomize
