You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I'm way too hungover for life right now
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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