Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.�
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
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