Barsexuality is the new black.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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