I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
