Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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