In the future we'll all be gay
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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