im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
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