The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
you traded sex for a burrito?
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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