I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Randomize
